Individual and Couples Therapist in Portland, OR

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Couples Counseling in Portland, OR

Today’s couples in Portland face challenging circumstances that our modern lives and relationships

present. Facing challenges in your relationship is not unique. All couples are dealing with difficulties in their relationships on a regular basis. Successful couples are those who have developed a successful way to deal with those challenges. These couples seek out couples counseling to learn new ways of looking at issues, new insights, new skills for communicating, and transform their relationships.

Couples counseling begins by showing couples where they are going wrong and provides understanding about current patterns and actions that have kept the couple stuck. Couples counseling allows couples the space to better understand themselves and their partners, the chance to learn new skills, and the ability to practice their new behaviors under the watchful eye of an experienced couples therapist.

Common Problems Couples Are Facing Today

Common issues couples in Portland face include the following:

• Struggling with communication
• Managing stress
• Lacking emotional and/or physical intimacy
• Feeling alone and unsupported
• Lacking sense of being heard
• Dealing with betrayals
• Dealing with opposing beliefs or perspectives

How Couples Therapy Can Help

Couples therapy addresses a wide range of issues. Couples in Portland can benefit from counseling in the following ways:

• Showing couples their pattern – Many couples become stuck in a cycle of conflict surrounding their unmet needs. Couples counseling helps to illuminate the pattern and teaches couples how to approach each other from new and different places.
• Working with expectations and assumptions – Couples don’t always make their needs clear and can end up missing out on what they really want. Couples counseling helps each partner gain clarity on their expectations/needs and then teaches partners how to speak out about these issues in productive ways.
• Increasing intimacy – Couples often report a lack of physical or emotional intimacy, yet they often have little understand of what drove them apart. Couples counseling gives answers to couples about why they have drifted apart and teaches partners how to open up and allow for more intimacy.
• Improving safety and building trust – Couples counseling in Portland is often aimed at working with couples to feel more safety and security in their relationships. Feeling safe with and trusting your partner lies at the heart of what couples counseling aims to deliver.
• Gaining clarity – Many couples are unsure of what their future holds and often seek counseling to process their potential moves and find clarity on which paths to take. Whether you are unsure about whether to move forward in your relationship together or you are debating the decision to have kids, couples counseling can provide you with answers and a more clear direction.

Individual Therapy for Men in Portland Oregon

Men, have you struggled for a while on your own hoping to find solutions but coming up empty?
Maybe your partner as suggested therapy but you’ve thought therapy is for people who can’t “solve their own problems.” Individual therapy for men is designed for men who think just like this. Most of us have tried to make changes and our intent is usually in the right place.

The problem is that we haven’t identified the core issues and haven’t found suitable solutions. This is where therapy for men comes in. Individual therapy for men provides a place for men to speak out about their struggles, gain understanding of the core issues, and find solutions. If you want real change and would like to work with therapists that have helped hundreds of men find solutions, please contact us. We can help.

Common Issues Addressed in Individual Therapy

• Issues with Self-Esteem: Most men struggle with self-esteem on some level and these issues can show up in the form of ager, isolation, and stonewalling. Working to improve self-esteem is often a core focus in individual therapy for men.
• Anger issues: Anger is often the only emotion men will show. Your therapist will help you understand what lies underneath the anger and teaches you new ways to speak out. Working with anger is often crucial to give men a new way to communicate that transforms their own lives and relationships as well.
• Challenges with Parenting: The majority of men grew up with a less-than-ideal role model for a parent. We want to do better than our fathers did, but don’t have clarity on what that looks like. Individual therapy can show you how to live a healthier and more connected life with your kids.
• Work-life balance: Men often fall into the trap of over-focusing on work and underperforming in other areas of life. You might be doing great with your career, but your relationship or home-life is falling apart. Finding a sustainable balance for work and life is crucial and a central focus for many men in individual therapy.
• Communication: Men aren’t generally known for their great communication, we do the best we know how, but it often falls short of our partner’s expectations. Individual therapy for men can teach you how to communicate your thoughts, feelings, and needs in a way that will work better for you and those around you.

Benefits of Individual Therapy

Benefits of individual therapy can include:

• Managing emotions – learning how to understand and manage feelings
• Improving self-esteem – creating a better relationship with yourself and others
• Better communication – learning to share your inner experience
• Creating healthy boundaries – lessening stress and unburdening yourself
• Developing empathy – gaining understanding and compassion for others
• Improved and stable mood – fewer highs and lows to deal with

Our Approach

Our Approach

Douglas Counseling seeks to meet each individual or couple where they are without judgement. We seek to understand the challenges being faced and what is keeping the person or couple stuck. Our therapists at Douglas Counseling collaborate with the client to build a detailed plan to address the current issues and make strides towards finding solutions.

What to Expect

Your first therapy session will include 3 main phases. First, your therapist will learn more about you and your background. Your therapist will ask questions to learn more about personal history, current struggles, and what you have done to work on them yourself. Next your therapist will help you to explore what you would want to happen at the end of the counseling process. Your goals will be processed, and you and your therapist will gain clarity on what you consider a successful outcome. At the end of your therapy session your therapist will give you feedback on why you are getting/staying stuck and will propose a plan to help you work towards successful completion of your goals. Your therapist will make recommendations including what will be worked on, how often you should attend sessions, and their estimation of what a course of therapy entails.

Our approach at Douglas Counseling is always to collaborate with the client. Your input and insights are critical to putting together a successful plan for therapy. At Douglas Counseling you are not a passive bystander with therapy but rather are at the heart of the healing process.

Client Testimonials and Success Stories

Leila and Patrick: This couple came to therapy after the discovery of a recent betrayal and weren’t sure they could stay together. After a full course of couples counseling, they had this to say: “We didn’t think there was much hope to save our marriage when we started counseling.” “Our therapist urged us to stick with the plan, to keep an open mind, and stick with the process.” “I’m glad we did because our relationship is better than ever!” “Neither one of us was happy with how things were before and now we look back at the betrayal as a blessing in disguise.” “If you are in a similar place, I’d urge you to give couples counseling a chance.” “It sure worked for us.”

Phil: This individual came to counseling to work on himself and his relationship. He had dealt with substance abuse, gambling, and not showing up for his partner for years. Here’s what Phil had to say about his experience with Douglas Counseling: “The therapist was really accepting, and I was actually surprised to hear that lots of people deal with the same things I had.” “My therapist helped me make connections to what I’d been doing as an adult that really stems from what I had to go through as a child.” “It really helped to make sense of why I acted the way I did.” “Knowing that my old actions were just an attempt to cope with my stresses I was able to get things turned around.”

Vicky and Fernando: This couple came in with a solid relationship but wanted to work on improving their communication to have an even better relationship. This is what they had to say during their last couples session: “The stuff we learned about communicating was super helpful.” “I wish I had been taught the skills and methods we learned in therapy when I was a kid.” “People think couples therapy is only for people struggling and on the brink of divorce, but we wanted to make sure we never got to that point.” “Our time in couples counseling changed the way we think about each other, and we’ve recommended several of our friends to Douglas Counseling.”

Daphne and Mark P. from Portland: This couple started counseling just as they were sending their youngest child off the college. Daphne had been trying to get Mark to agree to counseling for months and he finally agreed to give it a shot. The couple talked about wanting to feel closer to each other, spend more time together, and feel like they were choosing to be together rather than just “existing” as a couple.

As therapy progressed the couple learned about why they had grown so distant. The pressures of Mark’s small business, dealing with Daphne’s aging parents, and the focus mainly on their kid’s activities had led to this couple living parallel lives. They were together battling through life, but not feeling close and connected as the would want. Their therapist helped the couple to see the importance of reworking their priorities and to place their relationship on par with any other area. The couple was also taught how to make bids for connection that showed each partner the other really did want to connect.

After 15 sessions the couple had made great progress and together with their therapist decided counseling had been successful. This couple followed up with their therapist about 3 months after their last session and reported that they felt much better and were feeling more connected than they had in years.

Kevin K. from Portland: Kevin entered individual therapy to work on himself as well as improve his relationship with his wife. The client talked about feeling like he withdraws from life and when not at work just wanting to play video games by himself to decompress.

Kevin’s therapy centered on gaining understanding of where he learned to withdraw and isolate. Kevin talked about living in a volatile family where his parents would argue and fight on a daily basis. The client spoke about retreating to his room because it was the only place he could feel calm and avoid the conflict. With the help of his therapist Kevin learned that he formed an “adaptive behavior” of isolating to avoid conflict and find peace. The problem was that Kevin was using the old tool learned during childhood in a new system, and it wasn’t working.

Much of the work in therapy was teaching Kevin a new method of thinking about and then coping with the stressors in his life. He was shown how anything that felt stressful at all was being coded as dangerous and he needed to retreat. With the help of his therapist Kevin was able to learn to ‘code’ his stressors as challenging but to also see himself as capable. After learning new tools and reprogramming his view on stress Kevin has been able to spend more time with his partner and less time alone isolation.

Naomi F. from Portland: Naomi came to therapy with hopes of working on setting better boundaries with others. The client had moved her mother in to live with her over 2 years ago thinking it was a temporary solution. Naomi was growing weary of her mother not making progress with finding a place of her own and saw that her mother living with her was starting to impact her relationship with her boyfriend.

Through therapy Naomi saw that she had always thought of her role in the family as “holding it all together.” She had been the glue that kept other family members in contact when they were at odds. She had been her mother’s confidant after her divorce from Naomi’s father. Therapy helped Naomi see that her role as the family ‘fixer’ might help her fractured family in the short-term but had negative implications long-term.

Naomi learned about boundaries including what responsibilities she has and what others can be in charge of. The client learned that she was doing things for others that they could do for themselves and began to voice her feelings, expectations, and set limits. Speaking up to her mother and asking for her to make progress towards moving out was uncomfortable, but helped Naomi feel empowered and capable of shaping her own future. Naomi is a great example of someone learning about how setting boundaries, being willing to say no, and taking back their own power can make all the difference.

FAQs

Where are you located?
Douglas Counseling is Located in Lake Oswego in the Lake Grove area. The address is 16325 Boones Ferry Rd. Suite 209, Lake Oswego OR, 97035

What are your hours?
Our Hours are Monday – Friday 9am to 7pm

How many sessions will I need to attend?
The number of sessions needed varies and will be discussed with you by your therapist as part of your initial appointment. Most couples can expect a full course of therapy to last about 12 sessions. Individuals can usually expect to meet between 10-12 meetings.

How much do the sessions cost?
The cost depends on the therapist you work with.

Licensed therapist at the associate level: The initial 90-minute session cost is $220 and ongoing 60-minute sessions cost $180.

Licensed therapist at the owner level: The initial 90-minute session cost of $275 and ongoing 60-minute sessions cost $225.

Do you take insurance?
We do not directly accept insurance. Most insurance companies will not reimburse for couples counseling as they don’t consider it a “medical necessity.” Individuals with “out of network” benefits for counseling are welcomed to submit a statement that Douglas Counseling can provide to be reimbursed for a portion of the therapy costs.

What’s the best way to schedule an appointment?
The best way to schedule a session is to call the Douglas Counseling office directly at (503) 388-6611. You can schedule a session or set up a free consultation with one of our therapists.

Do you provide virtual appointments?
Yes, Douglas Counseling provides virtual/online appointments to all clients residing in Oregon. We use a secure telehealth platform for our online sessions.​

About Portland, OR

Portland is the largest and most populated city in Oregon. The city spans 145 square miles and contains 635,067 residents (as of 2022). Portland’s population makes it the 26^th most populous city in the United States. Portland is bordered by the Columbia River to the north and is split East and West by the Willamette River. Portland is located in the northwestern part of Oregon.
[source: Wikipedia]

Portland has a large number of families with 38% of its residents being married and living together and 24% having children under the age of 18. Portland residents are dealing with increased stress from the rising cost of living, making time for their partners and families, and finding some balance between working and taking care of themselves.

Notable neighborhoods in Portland include: Pearl District, Northwest Portland, Nob Hill, Sellwood – Moreland, Laurelhurst, Goose Hollow, Irvington, Arlington Heights, Mount Tabor, Southwest Hills, Hawthorne, Eastmorland, and Multnomah.

The Douglas Counseling Office is located just south of Portland in the town of Lake Oswego. Our office is a 15-minute drive for many Portland residents, especially those living on the west side of town.

Popular landmarks include the Portland Japanese Garden, The Oregon Zoo, Washington Park, The Pittock Mansion, the International Rose Test Garden, Powell’s City of Books, Forest Park, and the Hoyt Arboretum

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